The Firsts
Wedding Anniversary weekend. It’s tomorrow actually. 24 years. I’ve been dreading it for weeks now, and thanks to Facebook memories, I get to look back on some of our anniversaries together. The first one that comes to mind is, we’ve never really spent an anniversary together, so, like so many before, this one will really be no different, except, it really will be. Mark worked the weekend shift for so many years, that special occasions were often celebrated days before, or days after. We never really held much stock on the actual day. Anniversaries were no different. Usually a card was placed beside my coffee cup and I’d get it when I got up, or, there wasn’t, and I’d get a phone call later in the day, wishing me a happy anniversary, or I would call him, laughing, to wish him one. We were never a couple who needed date nights, or grand gifts or weekend get-always. We were just happy being together. Our life, was very simple. Date nights, which were very rare, may of included a trip to Walmart, or the grocery store, or, one of our favourites, a trip to A&W, where we would share an order of onion rings and a root beer. Even our wedding was simple. Clean jeans, work boots, a couple witnesses and a few guests. That was it. I am not even certain, if we have pictures to mark the event. If we do, I haven’t seen them. Years later, Mark decided, that for our 10th Anniversary, he wanted to renew our vows ( mostly for the nay sayers, there were a few.) In a church, with our families, and proper attire. It was fabulous, but again, not on the actual day.
We were firm believers in every day being together, was a special day. We didn’t need calendars, or reminders. We didn’t need outlandish gifts to each other to prove our love, we figured as long as there were 2 cars in the driveway each night, no matter what..... we had it beat. Marriages and relationships these days are very disposable. Not happy, leave. Not happy, must be someone better, not happy, look outside or elsewhere. Marriage is tough. It’s a pile of work, even when your head over heels in love. Every day, the game changes. Situations arise, circumstances happen, your tested. Throw a couple kids, dogs and cats into the mix, and it quickly becomes a free for all event. Like most free for all’s, the strongest survive, the ones with the most fortitude and patience usually come out on top. I think love and marriage is the same. Strong fortitude and patience wins every time.
I remember the first time our eyes met. At the Irving Restaurant. I had just spent the night on a bus, travelling home from Montreal for a quick surprise visit. I was even surprised at the visit, as the night before, Maureen and I trolled downtown Montreal, drinking a few ( a lot) of beers, we had the ingenious idea to grab the bus and come home for the weekend, needless to say, 4 hours into our bus trip, the party was over, but in too deep to change plans. Anyway, once in Hartland, after a couple more beer ( we were young, hungover and what do you do when your young and hung over? Have a beer! ) we went out for breakfast. There he was, sitting at the counter, reading the paper. Our eyes met. Mine glassy, but sassy, his tired and impatient. I was bold at that age ( and full of beer) I started a conversation with him. Plans were made for that night....... the rest is history. Literally, we were together 26 years after that meeting. I lived in Montreal during 2 years of our time together, he travelled to Montreal every other weekend after that. Just that easy, just that simple.
So I guess, from the first time we locked eyes, until the very last time, we knew. Loving each other was never a problem, if love could fix everything, we would be together but apart this anniversary weekend as well. But, sadly, it doesn’t. But, that’s another story, for another time. For today, its my anniversary weekend. I was married to a rock star for 24 years. There’s no card by my coffee cup, there will be no phone call later...... but my heart, like it has been for so many years, is full to capacity with love for the man, the legend, the Weekend Warrior.... I hope there is root beer in heaven.
We were firm believers in every day being together, was a special day. We didn’t need calendars, or reminders. We didn’t need outlandish gifts to each other to prove our love, we figured as long as there were 2 cars in the driveway each night, no matter what..... we had it beat. Marriages and relationships these days are very disposable. Not happy, leave. Not happy, must be someone better, not happy, look outside or elsewhere. Marriage is tough. It’s a pile of work, even when your head over heels in love. Every day, the game changes. Situations arise, circumstances happen, your tested. Throw a couple kids, dogs and cats into the mix, and it quickly becomes a free for all event. Like most free for all’s, the strongest survive, the ones with the most fortitude and patience usually come out on top. I think love and marriage is the same. Strong fortitude and patience wins every time.
I remember the first time our eyes met. At the Irving Restaurant. I had just spent the night on a bus, travelling home from Montreal for a quick surprise visit. I was even surprised at the visit, as the night before, Maureen and I trolled downtown Montreal, drinking a few ( a lot) of beers, we had the ingenious idea to grab the bus and come home for the weekend, needless to say, 4 hours into our bus trip, the party was over, but in too deep to change plans. Anyway, once in Hartland, after a couple more beer ( we were young, hungover and what do you do when your young and hung over? Have a beer! ) we went out for breakfast. There he was, sitting at the counter, reading the paper. Our eyes met. Mine glassy, but sassy, his tired and impatient. I was bold at that age ( and full of beer) I started a conversation with him. Plans were made for that night....... the rest is history. Literally, we were together 26 years after that meeting. I lived in Montreal during 2 years of our time together, he travelled to Montreal every other weekend after that. Just that easy, just that simple.
So I guess, from the first time we locked eyes, until the very last time, we knew. Loving each other was never a problem, if love could fix everything, we would be together but apart this anniversary weekend as well. But, sadly, it doesn’t. But, that’s another story, for another time. For today, its my anniversary weekend. I was married to a rock star for 24 years. There’s no card by my coffee cup, there will be no phone call later...... but my heart, like it has been for so many years, is full to capacity with love for the man, the legend, the Weekend Warrior.... I hope there is root beer in heaven.
So well written my friend. I remember in the early years just how cute you 2 were together.
ReplyDeleteOMHeart. This made me cry
ReplyDeleteBeautifully said. I am crying and thinking of you.
ReplyDelete